2 eggs
1/2 egg’s worth of whole milk
1 shallot
1 clove garlic
handful mushrooms
tomato
aged Gouda
dry white wine
salt & pepper

1. Break eggs into bowl, add milk, and scramble. (Milk is one of the two secrets to creamy scrambled eggs.) Don’t add the salt yet; it will toughen the eggs. Set aside to warm.
2. Finely slice shallot and mince garlic. Saute until shallots become translucent, about four minutes.
3. Chop the mushrooms. Use a good flavorful dark mushroom, not those useless white buttons.
4. Add the mushrooms to the pan and sauté until they begin to wilt.
5. Add a bit of the white wine and reduce. Inhale. Yum.
6. Add egg and stir constantly with wooden spatula. Constant stirring means the eggs firm simultaneously, and none dry out.
7. When eggs begin to firm, add chopped tomato and Gouda.
8. Transfer to the eggs to the plate while they are still a bit moist.
9. Add black pepper to taste.
10. Shake two shakes salt onto eggs.
11. Rap salt shaker against sink to clear holes.
12. Add one more shake of salt.
13. Reverse shaker, allowing bottom of shaker to fall onto eggs, with 50g of salt right behind it.
14. Curse like a sailor.